We're so sorry Uncle Albert
But we haven't done a bloody thing all day!
Paul McCartney
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The last stage of the Idiots’ cruise from the Mekong Delta to Siem Reap, Cambodia was – on a bus. For most of the year, the cruise ships can]t negotiate the giant-but-shallow Tonle Sap Lake. The ship stops at Udong – and passengers load buses for a 5 ½ hour ride to Siem Reap.
The Idiots got word that their lodging, the Khymer Mansion Boutique Hotel, offered a free pickup from the airport and scrambled to arrange a pickup instead from their bus stop – the Sofitel. It is always so reassuring to see a smiling driver holding a sign with one’s name. They were a bit surprised to actually be met by two people. The hotel’s car had mechanical problems, so they sent Vannak – a delightful young woman in a sharp uniform – with a tuk-tuk driver. In Cambodia, a Tuk-Tuk is a cart attached to a motorbike that can comfortably carry four… or three and suitcases if stacked very, very carefully! A ten-minute ride through the bustling streets brought them to their hotel – conveniently near the day and night markets but located down a side street providing privacy and separation from the hubbub.
When they arrived they were ushered into an open air lobby and given cold towels to refresh themselves. As the paperwork was being completed, they were greeted by no fewer than four hotel workers, each contact involving a series of pleasant questions and answers. They were also offered cold water and a variety of snacks including brownies and some exceptional taro chips. Around them, the beauties of a Buddhist house shrine and statues and lotus flowers. They had to touch the flowers to be sure they were real... they seemed so perfect they might be silk...
After many smiles and much bowing and an immense amount of solicitous care, the Idiots were ensconced in their deluxe poolside room.
The Idiots had to ask about the blossoms – the center looked like lotus but the petals were not “right.” They learned the staff carefully fold each petal and leaf to make the star pattern…
Hmmmm… fruit plate, flowers, a little deck overlooking the infinity pool… they could probably get used to this!
Today they slept in… then walked the 15 feet to the poolside table to have a sumptuous breakfast. They played backgammon and pinochle and chatted with several different employees and the owner. The bartender thought they might need sustenance and brought ice water and spiced peanuts and somehow it was past noon. The serene surroundings encourage indolence.
The spa is 25 feet from their room, so Idiot She arranged a massage for a little later.
The Khymer Mansion is all about the details. For example… one expects to have a public bathroom near the pool. One doesn’t necessarily expect it to have a courtyard and flowers!
Peek through the trees…
The building is old and quaint and friendly, and the grounds are exceptionally well kept… but what really sets this place apart is the people. So many staff, all striving to make sure visitors are having an excellent, restful experience. How does one cut the grass at the Khymer Mansion? Why.. with a scissors, of course!
All the staff speak pretty good English, but errors in communication can occur. One example… when the General Manager greeted the Idiots, he wished them a Happy Valentine’s Day. They chatted a bit and Idiot He realized that the Idiots’ first Valentine’s Day together had been exactly 50 years ago, making this their 51st Valentine’s Day together. The GM was impressed and congratulated them.
A little back story. In 1967, the Idiots had just started dating in January and Idiot He found himself falling down the rabbit hole that is teenage love. Valentine’s Day snuck up on him. The day arrived and he realized he was empty-handed. He had little money and no time… and their small town had few options for finding just the right Valentine’s present - one that said “I like you and I’m not sure what you think about me but I think this might be going somewhere…”
In desperation, he turned to his cousin Larry who worked at Bost’s drug store. Searching the rows, they found a very odd stuffed animal – a three foot long white plush snake with red hearts for eyes and a red ribbon around it’s “neck.” Idiot She accepted the snake and it remained with them for many years - but it was clearly a case of "it's the sentiment that counts"
Bottom line – Idiot He hasn’t been great with Valentine’s Day. A few years ago he complicated things by arranging a spectacularly good Valentine’s surprise – an excursion by boat from Puerto Rico to Vieques for dinner and a swim in a lake with bioluminescent creatures – a magical experience. Nothing like doing a poor job on the most romantic holiday of the year for decades, then doing something SO good it could never be matched!
So… realizing they would be in Siem Reap for Valentine’s Day, Idiot He selected the Khymer Mansion as a bit of a splurge with an emphasis on pampering.
As they finished their play, one of their new friends, Narra, asked if they could service the room. The Idiots typically like to ease the burden of the staff a bit and hang out the “Do Not Disturb” sign at least every other day. They politely declined. Narra was disturbed… she clearly wanted the Idiots to reconsider. Finally she said “I had a dream last night. I dreamed there was a gecko in your room.” The Idiots laughed and said that was fine – that they liked geckos because they eat bugs. Narra replied that it was really a big gecko and that just was not acceptable. Finally the Idiots surrendered and said the staff could go in the room.
It took a long time, and several staff went in and out. The Idiots bided their time sitting by the pool, all the while wondering how it could take so long and so many people to service the room. They’d only occupied it for half a day.
When they finally were allowed back in – this is what they found!
All the bed decorations are made from flowers and leaves. There was a nice bottle of wine and two glasses “compliments of th GM.” Even the bathroom sink was romantic…
OK… it wasn’t really their 51st Anniversary… but it was their 51st Valentine’s Day together… and a little romance is never a bad thing. They accepted good wishes from the staff for the rest of the day! While Idiot She had her massage, He went in search of chocolate and returned with two excellent pastries from a French bakery down the street. Pastries and iced coffee on their little deck segued naturally into a little nap… and then it was Happy Hour and a couple of
Singapore Slings seemed in order… and then there didn’t seem to be any reason to go out when there was a perfectly good dinner available at their little table by the pool…
And that’s why the Idiots are in Siem Reap, Cambodia… the site of the largest religious construction in the world – Angkor Wat… and they spent the whole day in their hotel!
